Post by Spartan 970 Field Marshal 'Mil on Aug 8, 2016 15:31:24 GMT
Ever get those responses on your faction application that state "You have some grammar issues and phrasing errors in your application."?
At a first glance, reviewers may see these errors as a sign of laziness on your application and people may dismiss the application entirely. However, sometimes correct English writing isn't exactly everyone's forte, and people may actually not know about the English errors in their writing. The applicant may actually know a lot about medical treatment for a medical application, or they may know a lot about sangheili culture and lore to roleplay as them. Its just an overall technicality in an application that some may have had the ability to develop overtime, while others did not get the opportunity to practice proper English typing. While I may not have a masters degree in English writing (or any degree for that matter), and I am not perfect in English writing myself, I decided to try to give a crash course on applying English rules to applications. If the applicant is struggling to figure out what is wrong with their application, they can start here.
Commas:
The comma is used to indicate a pause while reading a sentence. One of the most common practices used when placing commas is to place it in a sentence when it "feels" like there should be a pause. While this may work in some cases, it can sometimes backfire completely and make sentences confusing to read. These backfires usually lead to run on sentences or comma splices. Realize that there are actual comma rules within typing, and that they must be followed if you ever want to improve your application. Here's a recommend website for learning the do's and don'ts of using commas.
m.grammarbook.com/punctuation-rules/commas.aspx
Comma splices:
This is a term used when a comma is incorrectly used. If you overuse commas within your application, you may encounter this sort of problem. Comma splices make whatever sentence you are trying to type even more confusing than what you are trying to do. Here is one of the most basic comma splices I usually encounter.
Voro 'Tuyok enters into the sangheili quarters, he shuts the door behind him.
Two or more independent clauses (Basically stand alone sentences that do not need to be tied together to another sentence) are linked together with a comma. At a first glance, it makes the sentence look rather wrong and will take the reader several seconds to understand what you are trying to say. The sentence can be fixed by the following ways:
Voro 'Tuyok enters into the sangheili quarters. He shuts the door behind him.
Voro 'Tuyok enters into the sangheili quarters, and he shuts the door behind him.
As Voro 'Tuyok enters into the sangheili quarters, he shuts the door behind him.
Although the incorrect sentence may not seem like a big deal at first glance, realize that if the applicant has not had knowledge of comma rules, then the application is most likely riddled with comma splices everywhere. The accumulation of comma splices usually kill the application entirely. Be wise in placing commas.
Run-On sentences:
It's where two sentences are joined together with no punctuation. They are simply awkward and redundant sentences. Here is an example of one:
Voro spent extra time in his meditation today that is why he missed the operation planning.
You can fix run-on sentences in a number of ways. The most common fix is simply adding a period.
Voro spent extra time in his meditation today. That is why he missed the operation planning.
Spelling:
Usually not much of concern considering that there is a handy spell-checker tool that eliminates the need to spell with complete accuracy. However, it is important to note that the spell-checker does not know your thought process. You could be trying to spell a certain word, spell-checker comes with some options to replace the word you are trying to spell, and some of those replacing words do not match with the sentence. Simply slow down with spell-checker and proofread your sentences, otherwise, you may end up having a particular word that distracts the reader.
Using Paragraphs:
No one wants to read a giant wall of text. Paragraphs make it easier to read your application, as well as show organization in the application. However, when paragraphs are asked, do not just make them at random intervals in your application. Paragraphs should organize all of your sentences you made, and they should not be distracting. Heres an example of a common wall of text:
Voro’ Tuyok had his tetradactyl hands on his needler rifle, he was quite eager for battle as this was a battle against the Covenant. He was tagged along with a small group of marines. They were to patrol along a sandy dune littered with large rocks, looking for signs of Covenant forces. All was quiet, until the tell-tale hum sound of uncloaking was heard from behind the party. Five assassin type elites appeared behind them, and immediately open fired.*Voro was quick to get behind cover and immediately fired back while the marines scrambled for cover of their own. Voro shot with deadly accuracy at one of the elites closest to him. With no time to react, the assassin was bombarded with pink needles until the cluster of many needles caused an explosion that wiped the life of the elite clean. The marines were preoccupied with a firefight between three of the assassins. Voro quickly realized that one of the elites were missing. Using his predatory senses, he brought out his energy sword and spun around just in time to parry a slice that was intended for his head.
Ick! No one wants to read all of that and process it all. Break this up into two paragraphs, but be smart where to make it. The best place to make a new paragraph is when you are trying to introduce a new idea or scenario. The best place to make a new paragraph, is right after the sentence indicated by the *. The new paragraph made introduces Voro's perspective against the assassins, while the beginning paragraph serves to introduce the scenario. Make paragraphs with intent; don't make paragraphs at random.
Adding detail:
Another common response to an application is that it requires more detail. Although not everyone enjoys creative writing, adding details to an application is really not that hard to do. You just got to be smart when adding details, otherwise it may backfire on you completely. You also want to use the power of commas to effectively add detail. Take the following sentences for example:
Voro 'Tuyok crushed the head of a marine with his foot. The blood from the head plastered the walls.
Violent indeed, but this is not adding detail correctly. The sentence afterwards distracts the reader from what he is reading. We don't care about the walls or where the blood went, and it did not affect Voro in any way. In fact, it's pretty fair to say that people will know where the blood will go if that marine head has been crushed anyways. Details should have a purpose when added, not to distract or make sentences redundant. Here's another sentence where details have made a sentence redundant:
Ridley Smee threw away the heavy dressings that had blood and were being used on a patient in the garbage can.
Detail is there, but makes the sentence awkward and confusing to read. If the applicant's purpose was to describe how Smee threw away used bandages while adding detail, he should use this sentence:
Ridley Smee threw away the used, bloody bandages into the garbage.
Shorter than the first one, but otherwise includes detail as well as being easier to read. Adding detail should be done wisely, never to distract the reader in anyway.
Tips and Strategies:
Understand that an application is like a job application. You should always make it neat before posting. It may be tempting to post it as quick as you can, but that will hurt you in the long run. This is evident in the special forces applications considering there is limited spots for them.
Make your application in google docs. Google docs automatically saves your progress as you type. That way, you wouldn't have to deal with the accidental deletion of your work if typing it in alteredrp.
Proofread your application outloud. You will be able to find awkward sentences and places that may need a period.
Don't just post your application and wait for responses; always take time reread your application to find any errors or mistakes before people find them for you.
The best practice to making good sentences in my opinion is to read. Read some English novels or read good applications. You're exposed to good English writing that you can use next time.
If you are still struggling with grammar issues, then it's time to take the next step and look online for English rules.
At a first glance, reviewers may see these errors as a sign of laziness on your application and people may dismiss the application entirely. However, sometimes correct English writing isn't exactly everyone's forte, and people may actually not know about the English errors in their writing. The applicant may actually know a lot about medical treatment for a medical application, or they may know a lot about sangheili culture and lore to roleplay as them. Its just an overall technicality in an application that some may have had the ability to develop overtime, while others did not get the opportunity to practice proper English typing. While I may not have a masters degree in English writing (or any degree for that matter), and I am not perfect in English writing myself, I decided to try to give a crash course on applying English rules to applications. If the applicant is struggling to figure out what is wrong with their application, they can start here.
Commas:
The comma is used to indicate a pause while reading a sentence. One of the most common practices used when placing commas is to place it in a sentence when it "feels" like there should be a pause. While this may work in some cases, it can sometimes backfire completely and make sentences confusing to read. These backfires usually lead to run on sentences or comma splices. Realize that there are actual comma rules within typing, and that they must be followed if you ever want to improve your application. Here's a recommend website for learning the do's and don'ts of using commas.
m.grammarbook.com/punctuation-rules/commas.aspx
Comma splices:
This is a term used when a comma is incorrectly used. If you overuse commas within your application, you may encounter this sort of problem. Comma splices make whatever sentence you are trying to type even more confusing than what you are trying to do. Here is one of the most basic comma splices I usually encounter.
Voro 'Tuyok enters into the sangheili quarters, he shuts the door behind him.
Two or more independent clauses (Basically stand alone sentences that do not need to be tied together to another sentence) are linked together with a comma. At a first glance, it makes the sentence look rather wrong and will take the reader several seconds to understand what you are trying to say. The sentence can be fixed by the following ways:
Voro 'Tuyok enters into the sangheili quarters. He shuts the door behind him.
Voro 'Tuyok enters into the sangheili quarters, and he shuts the door behind him.
As Voro 'Tuyok enters into the sangheili quarters, he shuts the door behind him.
Although the incorrect sentence may not seem like a big deal at first glance, realize that if the applicant has not had knowledge of comma rules, then the application is most likely riddled with comma splices everywhere. The accumulation of comma splices usually kill the application entirely. Be wise in placing commas.
Run-On sentences:
It's where two sentences are joined together with no punctuation. They are simply awkward and redundant sentences. Here is an example of one:
Voro spent extra time in his meditation today that is why he missed the operation planning.
You can fix run-on sentences in a number of ways. The most common fix is simply adding a period.
Voro spent extra time in his meditation today. That is why he missed the operation planning.
Spelling:
Usually not much of concern considering that there is a handy spell-checker tool that eliminates the need to spell with complete accuracy. However, it is important to note that the spell-checker does not know your thought process. You could be trying to spell a certain word, spell-checker comes with some options to replace the word you are trying to spell, and some of those replacing words do not match with the sentence. Simply slow down with spell-checker and proofread your sentences, otherwise, you may end up having a particular word that distracts the reader.
Using Paragraphs:
No one wants to read a giant wall of text. Paragraphs make it easier to read your application, as well as show organization in the application. However, when paragraphs are asked, do not just make them at random intervals in your application. Paragraphs should organize all of your sentences you made, and they should not be distracting. Heres an example of a common wall of text:
Voro’ Tuyok had his tetradactyl hands on his needler rifle, he was quite eager for battle as this was a battle against the Covenant. He was tagged along with a small group of marines. They were to patrol along a sandy dune littered with large rocks, looking for signs of Covenant forces. All was quiet, until the tell-tale hum sound of uncloaking was heard from behind the party. Five assassin type elites appeared behind them, and immediately open fired.*Voro was quick to get behind cover and immediately fired back while the marines scrambled for cover of their own. Voro shot with deadly accuracy at one of the elites closest to him. With no time to react, the assassin was bombarded with pink needles until the cluster of many needles caused an explosion that wiped the life of the elite clean. The marines were preoccupied with a firefight between three of the assassins. Voro quickly realized that one of the elites were missing. Using his predatory senses, he brought out his energy sword and spun around just in time to parry a slice that was intended for his head.
Ick! No one wants to read all of that and process it all. Break this up into two paragraphs, but be smart where to make it. The best place to make a new paragraph is when you are trying to introduce a new idea or scenario. The best place to make a new paragraph, is right after the sentence indicated by the *. The new paragraph made introduces Voro's perspective against the assassins, while the beginning paragraph serves to introduce the scenario. Make paragraphs with intent; don't make paragraphs at random.
Adding detail:
Another common response to an application is that it requires more detail. Although not everyone enjoys creative writing, adding details to an application is really not that hard to do. You just got to be smart when adding details, otherwise it may backfire on you completely. You also want to use the power of commas to effectively add detail. Take the following sentences for example:
Voro 'Tuyok crushed the head of a marine with his foot. The blood from the head plastered the walls.
Violent indeed, but this is not adding detail correctly. The sentence afterwards distracts the reader from what he is reading. We don't care about the walls or where the blood went, and it did not affect Voro in any way. In fact, it's pretty fair to say that people will know where the blood will go if that marine head has been crushed anyways. Details should have a purpose when added, not to distract or make sentences redundant. Here's another sentence where details have made a sentence redundant:
Ridley Smee threw away the heavy dressings that had blood and were being used on a patient in the garbage can.
Detail is there, but makes the sentence awkward and confusing to read. If the applicant's purpose was to describe how Smee threw away used bandages while adding detail, he should use this sentence:
Ridley Smee threw away the used, bloody bandages into the garbage.
Shorter than the first one, but otherwise includes detail as well as being easier to read. Adding detail should be done wisely, never to distract the reader in anyway.
Tips and Strategies:
Understand that an application is like a job application. You should always make it neat before posting. It may be tempting to post it as quick as you can, but that will hurt you in the long run. This is evident in the special forces applications considering there is limited spots for them.
Make your application in google docs. Google docs automatically saves your progress as you type. That way, you wouldn't have to deal with the accidental deletion of your work if typing it in alteredrp.
Proofread your application outloud. You will be able to find awkward sentences and places that may need a period.
Don't just post your application and wait for responses; always take time reread your application to find any errors or mistakes before people find them for you.
The best practice to making good sentences in my opinion is to read. Read some English novels or read good applications. You're exposed to good English writing that you can use next time.
If you are still struggling with grammar issues, then it's time to take the next step and look online for English rules.